Iron Man 2

Ah, Summer blockbusters, I've missed your ridiculous budgets and ginormagantuan explosions. Welcome back, you dumb, loveable bastards.

Iron Man 2 (2010)

Iron Man 2 was probably one of my most anticipated films of the year. After 2008's fantastic first instalment, I was pumped for the sequel. After all, superhero sequels don't have to deal with the obligatory origin story, so are usually freer in terms of narrative and characters than the originals.

"I am Iron Man. The suit and I are one."

After his admission that he is Iron Man, billionaire Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is enjoying the global celebrity the popularity of his high-tech suit has allowed. However, angry Russian bruiser Ivan Venko (Mickey Rourke) is out to take revenge on Stark under the guise of supervillain Whiplash and with the aid of crackling, fuckingmegahuge-voltage electric whips . In addition to all this, Stark's business rival, Justin Hammer (Sam Rockwell) is trying to sabotage him at every turn. The story is great, with some fantastic dialogue and action beats throughout. I did feel that the inclusion of fan-favourite character War Machine was a little unnecessary, but passable on the fact that he's a metal-plated arse kicking machine. Downey Jr. was on form as Tony Stark, although I did get the feeling that he may have upped the "wackiness factor" on the character, which spoiled the well-balanced personality set up in the original film. Mickey Rourke was good as Ivan Vanko, giving us a villain who's not entirely two-dimensional, sadly still a rarity in superhero films.

With an A-List cast and huge production budget, it's no wonder that Iron Man 2 feels a little bloated at times. Not enough time is spent with Vanko to make him a tangible threat and the film focuses instead on whiny Stark-wannabe Justin Hammer (Rockwell gives a great turn as the Stark rival and makes Hammer into a character you just want to reach through the screen and throttle). Whilst he is well played, he's clearly less interesting than the crazy Russian. War Machine isn't really given the attention the character deserves either, but this isn't a Venom/Spider-Man 3 type disaster. If you don't get that reference, congratulations- you have a life.

The action and set-pieces are brilliant. It's hard not to smile at Iron Man's intro as he rockets onto a stage of scantily-clad dancers to the gently lilting strains of AC/DC's Shoot to Thrill. Well, unless you're some kind of feminist who likes intelligent films or something. The standout sequence for me was Vanko's appearance at the Monaco Grand Prix, cleaving Formula 1 cars into fine slices with his whips. It is here that Tony- suitless and scared, properly faces his enemy. It's a fantastic, down-and-dirty fight. It's a shame that the other action sequences fail to match up to it, with a lacklustre final showdown to round things off. In fact, Iron Man 2 repeats the mistake of its predecessor by ending in an uninspired thump-fest between hunks of metal. Still, as unoriginal as it is, it's still entertaining and doesn't sour things too much.

"If you could make God bleed, people will cease to believe in Him."

Overall, Iron Man 2 is a worthy sequel, but only just. There is plenty to enjoy here (the sight of Scarlett Johansson in a catsuit is arguably worth several times the admission price alone) but it just doesn't quite live up to the promises 2008's Iron Man made.

How To Train Your Dragon

It wouldn't have been the Easter holidays without some computer-generated kiddie flick vying for that precious, precious parent money and this year was no exception. You won't believe this, but it's only in fucking 3D as well! Will wonders never cease? Not anytime soon, we're about halfway through the fiscal year...

How To Train Your Dragon (2010)

It's practically the law now that if you release a kiddie-centric film it has to be in 3D. We all know why-kids are the most powerful advertising vessels known to man. Pitch a product at the child market and you have a guaranteed nagging, whining license to print money. In this case, the product is 3D, because everyone who isn't a gullible, dribbling spunksquit knows that this whole 3D thing is a crock of shite (I would like to take this opportunity to point you to my Monsters Vs. Aliens review where I basically suck 3D's dark, evil schlong and profess my love for it. Well, a lot has changed since then and I'm fucking fed up of this 3D nonsense. The novelty soon wore off.)

"Most people would leave, but not us. We're Vikings. We have stubbornness issues."

On the Viking island of Berk (no, really), the inhabitants are constantly under attack by dragons, burning their houses, stealing their women sheep and whatnot. We are introduced to clumsy kid Hiccup (Jay Baruchel) who yearns to be a big, strong Viking like his father Stoick the Vast (Gerard Butler). However, after accidently grounding a dragon dubbed "Toothless", Hiccup soon

discovers there might be more to dragons than their vicious appearance. The plot is actually pretty decent. The underlying messages of not judging on appearances and being kind to animals are sound ones and something that children should learn, if only by computer generated osmosis. The voice actors are all fine, although it is never explained why the Vikings have a Scottish leader and various Irish members of their clan.

How To Train Your Dragon (Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb) has some really enjoyable bits, but it's quite an inconsistent film. The flight sequences are genuinely thrilling, but some of the quieter, character based moments start to drag after a while. In fact, the film seems to struggle whenever there aren't any dragons on screen and the characters are left to explain what's going on to each other. Most of them are pretty standard comic relief type characters who do stuff like walking into walls and farting- something which will undoubtably make the kids happy but made me grind my teeth into a fine powder. The ending is great though, with an epic final battle to round things off. It's also surprisingly brave too with the fate of Hiccup (you'll know what I mean when you see it), which is to be applauded.

"Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile!"

How To Train Your Dragon is a fairly decent kids' film. It's by no means essential viewing- there are much better examples in the genre, but it's worth a viewing- in 2D if possible.

Green Zone

Yes, this review is extremely late. The film itself came and went fairly uneventfully, but I figured I'd better post the review up anyway. It's either review films or work for wages like a functioning member of society... So, Green Zone then.

Green Zone (2010)

It's right there. The first thing on the damn poster is "From the director of The Bourne Supremacy and The Bourne Ultimatum" and a whopping great photo of Matt Damon. It's very hard not to draw comparisons with a certain forgetful ass-whuppin' machine. It's a shame, really as Green Zone should be judged on its own merits as it certainly believes it has something to say for itself.

"I came to find weapons and save lives and I didn't find shit. I want to know why."

Chief Warrant Officer Roy Miller (Matt Damon) is posted to Iraq to justify the US invasion by finding weapons of mass destruction. With his search proving fruitless, he starts asking tricky questions, and soon even his own side are out to kill him. The story itself was alright, if a little predictable. Damon is fine as Miller, but the role doesn't exactly require him to stretch himself that much. At times, I felt Miller was a bit too "all-American" though, appearing to naturally choose the most patriotic thing he could at a moment's notice. Brendan Gleeson was great, proving that I will pretty much enjoy him in every film he appears in thanks to In Bruges. Jason Isaacs too, was quite the bad-ass. As someone who is used to Isaacs in his Lucius Malfoy guise, it was refreshing to see a different, less catty side of him (face it, Lucius Malfoy is a vicious bastard, but he's a bit girly. I mean, look at his hair...) Greg Kinnear was good too, although he didn't exactly have to play much further outside his normal "pompous dick" comfort zone.

I kept getting the feeling that Green Zone's message is slightly dated now. Other reviews have argued that the message is more relevant than ever, but I'm not so sure. Anyone with a brain in their head will have questioned the motives and possible shady dealings involved in the Iraq invasion, so why do I suspect that the film believes it is truly enlightening its audience with a never-before-considered notion?

A spiritual successor to Bourne, this ain't. Green Zone is probably best likened to The Hurt Locker and Blood Diamond in terms of general feel. I'm going to be purposefully ambiguous here so you can't argue with the preceding statement. The main purpose of it is to convey an idea, but there are moments of action that could justify a place in the action/adventure section of your local rental place. The action is, unsurprisingly, brilliant. Greengrass knows how to get the best out of a sequence and does so whilst making it look easy. The sequence in which Miller's team take a house full of "terrorists", is really well done.

My main problem with Green Zone is the way it handles the message it is so eager to ram down our throats. The message is a bit too simplistic to be a real revelation, for one. For two, well, Green Zone spends the last hour asking all these questions and then everything's wrapped up in a neat little parcel at the end. Seriously, no questions are left unanswered by the time the credits roll. Whilst I would normally expect a film to wrap up things convincingly, Green Zone seemed like the sort of film that would want to leave its audience asking questions on the way home. Also, in some parts I did find myself rather bored by the overly dramatic dialogue scenes.

"I'm saying there is a disconnect between what's in these packets and what we are seeing on the ground. There is a problem with the intelligence, sir."

So, Green Zone. It's a decent film with a lot to like about it. I just wish I didn't get the feeling that the film had delusions of grandeur whilst I watched it. Catch it if you can.

Kick-Ass

Having pratically lived in the cinema this Easter, I have many reviews to write. Kick-Ass is one of them.

Kick-Ass (2010)

Superhero films instantly grab my attention, even if I haven't heard of the titular superhero. Kick-Ass belongs in the "never heard of it" category. I was sort of anticipating it, but when I heard it was from the imagination of Mark Millar, scribe of the Wanted comics/film and co-written by Jane Goldman, co-writer on the surprisingly good Stardust, I was completely sold.

"With no power comes no responsibility."

The plot is basically that of Spider-Man with a few twists. Nerdy teen Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) notices that people simply don't help each other and takes it upon himself to dress up in a costume and re-invents himself as the superhero Kick-Ass. After defending a stranger from a brutal beating, Kick-Ass is filmed, put on the 'Net and becomes a YouTube sensation. Little does Dave know that there are "proper" superheroes out there- Big Daddy (Nic Cage) and his fouled-mouthed daughter Hit-Girl (Chloe Moretz) watching his even move. The plot is great. As I said, it is pretty much a carbon copy of the first Spidey film, but it comes into its own later on. The film is part parody, part normal film and for the most part it works well. I thought all the leads were great, but the persistant scene-stealer is Chloe Moretz's Hit-Girl who effortlessly draws your attention with her ultra-violent ways and her knowledge of four letter words. That's not to downplay Nic Cage's turn as Big Daddy who speaks in a dead-on (not to mention fucking funny) Adam West type voice. Special mention to Christopher Mintz-Plasse for his Red Mist portrayal. The guy's hilarious.

One of the many things I liked about Kick-Ass was the fact that all the costumed crusaders are presented in a different way to the normal "eat justice and shit honour" bullshit that we are normally lumbered with. They are all varying forms of insane, especially the team of Big Daddy and Hit-Girl who are unbelievably likeable, but undeniably deserve to be carted off to Arkham Asylum or some similar institution. Funny thing is, the sanest character is probably big baddie Frank D'Amico (Mark Strong) which is a nice reversal from the norm.

There are some fantastic scenes too. In fact, many of the scenes in Kick-Ass are fantastic ones. It seems like a disservice to mention the select few. Having said that, I can't write a review without mentioning one of my favourite bits- the origin of Big Daddy and Hit-Girl, which takes us into a 3D comic book style scene which impressed the living hell out of me.

However, I do feel there are some problems with it. Firstly, I felt that the film was trying way too hard to appeal to da yout'. For example, in one of the establishing scenes, Dave is on his MACBOOK, speaking to a friend on SKYPE. His friend asked if he's seen the latest FAMILY GUY. Later on Kick-Ass has a MYSPACE page and is a huge hit on YOUTUBE. I have a horrible feeling that all the capitalised words were blank spaces in the script until a tea boy told them what was popular these days. (Also, you can replace the above capitalised words for rude ones like "arse", for a fun game to play when you've lost the will to live.) My second problem is a small one, really. Many of the more graphically violent action scenes have some upbeat track playing over the top. A particular gripe was when Hit-Girl was kicking ass and taking legs to the strains of "Bad Reputation". I realise that this is meant to make the violence less shocking, but c'mon- that feckin' song was used in Shrek! It really took me out of the moment.

"Tool up, honey bunny. It's time to get bad guys."

As you've probably guessed, I loved Kick-Ass. It's a fun mix of insanity, ultra-violence and daft bastards in costumes. Go and see it as fast as your legs can carry you.